i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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