I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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