Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
you will always have a special place in my vag
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Randomize
