Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
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