we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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