He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
