addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
