Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
