The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
