how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Randomize
