so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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