if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize
