So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Randomize
