I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
