i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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