I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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