Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
