At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
So apparently I’m into choking now
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Will exercising make me less horny?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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