gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize