Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
