You're completely useless in the revolution.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
please come you make the beer taste better
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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