what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
