life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
