Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
