If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
We were destined to go to rehab together
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Two words: blizzard sex
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
