Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
you didnt know i had herpes?
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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