hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
i think i just lost a toe
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
