This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
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