Got a toothbrush?
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
