Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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