We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Randomize
