I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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