best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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