Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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