I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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