we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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