Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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