Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
ttyl tear gas
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Randomize
