I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
thus making me awesome and them whores
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Randomize