your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
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