Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
