we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
