Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
