Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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