i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
