For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
