i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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