I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize
