ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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