i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
