Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
