I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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